We arrived in Washington last night after a one and a half hour flight. The place is clearly what I expected and we won't be spending more time here than we have to. Just a quick round of the sights and then off on the Greyhound. Our next destination is not set yet - we are aiming for NYC but may delay depending on time.

Before we departed yesterday, Alex showed us his new house (or the start of it) and we called around to see Krissy and Matt's child-infested house (there were four kids over, including Joel). Once we had finished we upped and offed to the airport, and once in DC contended with the most surreal and complicated arrivals system we have ever encountered.

Apparently we have a cat called Alice, but nobody told me until today. Nice.

Betty and Rusty's smells of the old-style USA. From the beat up caravans to the long, thin and sharp cacti, the whole thing is genuine John Wayne (without the Hollywood factor). Betty married Rusty a long while back, and she was a third of his age and most certainly not his first wife when it happened. They have an interesting collection of stories and a very forward attitude to talking about 'personal things' considering they are surrounded by 20-something year olds and are both (well) over 50 (Rusty is nearer 80).

We arrived and were quickly assigned to horses for a late evening horse trek through the desert. I have never had any desire to ride horses, however if there had been any opportunity in my life where I would have wanted to have started it was here. And so I was acquainted with Mitsy. I don't know what you can say about a horse, but Mitsy was a good horse and tended to life to walk of her (?) own accord. Apart from this tendency to wander, I enjoyed the ride a great deal and will definitely try it again sometime in the future.

Half way through the ride we stopped for a bathe in a nearby lake. Extremely warm it was very refreshing but also bearable and after our short break, dried off and headed back to the camp where Betty, Rusty and nephew Joel sang cowboy songs while we scoffed down a shoulder of beef, cowboy style.

Rusty certainly had some funny stories and funny opinions. We were all enlightened to hear how he defended himself in one court by explaining that he had stolen a rope and the horse had been attached to it. The laughter and commotion that this had caused meant the judge had to adjourn the hearing an it was never recommenced. Also his views that he could get a new doll in the blink of an eye if he wanted, his games of body-shots with previous trek groups and his one liners on how the grand canyon was formed (Betty dropped a nickel) or how he'd had running water all his life - 'she just had to run and get it'.

We drank the night away until we ran out of alcohol, except for Kristie and James who polished off a bottle of vodka between themselves and clearly had much to show for it. I had the honour of sleeping next to them and the conversation was more than interesting. Pete managed to scare the crap out of the two drunkards with his cow skull/wild donkey routine, and all in all we had a fantastic night finding out about each other. James and my drinking game compendium certainly was appreciated and led to many a revelation.

The next morning a number of us went off in search of the showers (at a local redneck campsite) and James received the final instalment of his haircut which had been started in the pitch black of the night before. After all this was done we set off on the final leg of the tour - the road to LA. A number of hours later (in the evening) we arrived in Beverley Hills.CA. All the major 'drives' had to be experienced and so Joe took us on a roadtrip including Rodeo Drive, Bel Air, the walk of fame, the Chinese Theatre, the Kodak Theatre and finally the Hollywood hills/sign. This was the end of the tour officially. We drove to our hotel and then went our own ways. James and I stayed in the end hotel (the Haceyenda) along with Joe, John and Laura, so we met up for a bot to eat at a nearby cafe with Ellie and Kerry for a final time before properly parting.

The next morning James and I decided to see what available routes were obtainable using free hotel shuttle connections, but after reaching the airport (LAX baby) decided we had been outwitted. Instead we went to the Air Canada desk and asked if we could have our flights brought a day forward as LA really was rapidly losing all sense of appeal. They obliged, and at no extra cost we arranged for our Toronto flight to be moved, much to our pleasure. Afterwards we headed back to the hotel and got in touch with Pete and Kristie who were still in the area and whom had hired a car. The text we received was to pack our beach stuff and met them outside the hotel at 2.30pm, which we did and took the long cruise to Santa Monica. Considering LA is one city it is absolutely sprawling, and it took a good 45 minutes to cross to the coast (in very easy traffic).

Santa Monica is not a beach with highly sung praises (apart from by Sheryl Crow) as Venice is the preferred tourist destination, but us pasty white Brits love nothing more than a bit of cold water and sand to indulge our wildest passions of being somewhere vaguely tepid and polluted with just a pair of swim shorts on. So while tyhe Aussies moaned about the lack of good waves and the coolness of the sea, James and I indulged in the lukewarm millpond. A couple of hours forward and we decided it was probably advisable to inform my Canadian relatives of the change of flight plans, so dried off, took a short walk up and down the beach, went to the Apple store, browsed the farmers market, then phoned to to tell them of the 24hr change in plan. See you in 12 hours type of thing.

Pete dropped us off back at the hotel and we said our goodbyes. We really hope to meet with out Australian friends again in the next few months, and so we said farewell and left them to go off to discover the delights of Disneyland. The next morning required a breakfast then speedy departure to the airport where we finally caught our flight to Toronto. Disappointingly I didn't strike up a conversation with the woman sitting net to me, that is until she offered me a SpongeBob Squarepants carrot, when I discovered that although on the first day of her new job, she was in fact the personal assistant to the Vice President of Promotions at Disney and there to promote their three new films at the Toronto film festival - ShopGirl (Steve Martin, Clare Danes), Flightplan (Jodie Foster) and The Greatest Game In The World (Which neither of us had any idea about what it was about, except she had to read up on it as she was meant to be selling it to the critics). Too late to ask for a ticket.

Ata the airport we were greeted by Auntie Kiki and Uncle Garry. We were whisked back to the house where we soon bedded down for the night. Next morning we got up and went for a swim. Today was to be our 'chillax' day and so we strolled down to the local mall for a Timmy's and to get our photos burnt onto CD. On arriving back a couple of hours later we met up with my cousin Matthew, wife Krissy and newest addition to the family Joel, age nearly two years. Unfortunately Joel was a little shy (apparently something which only started in the past couple of weeks) but at least it gave me my first chance to see my cousin-once-removed. After more swimming, Alex and Matthew took us to the Kings Arms (authentic British pub, cough cough) for some food and a drink. It was here I rediscovered Keith's, which is a drink we haven't had in over two years, but still remains a favourite of mine. A large portion of food later and we headed back to Lakeshore.

Another morning and this time we had a day in Toronto. Auntie Kiki dropped us at the GO station and we caught the slow moving train into Union Station. We had planned to meet with Alex for lunch, but despite out contact attempts this never happened, and instead James and I grabbed Subway for lunch then headed to the cinema for some post-dinner entertainment.

Despite some initial confusion (James had forgot to adjust his watch and we turned up to watch the 40 Year Old Virgin three hours ahead of schedule) we swapped our tickets and got to see Batman Begins on the IMAX screen. For me the best movies on IMAX are the action ones, and despite not being a comic fan in the slightest, this really was a good film and best watched this way. Little did we know that 24hrs after the end of that one we would be back in another IMAX thatre watching another film, this time Charlie and the Choclate Factory.

Back home we had a pork roast (rudely interrupting my dosage of Season 3, the OC) before showing off our vast photo collection and heading to bed. And that finally brings me up-to-date, or at least, up to today.

Today was another late-ish rise and was spent down at Woodbine, the famous racetrack about 40 minutes from Oakville. The last time I was there was probably 6 or 7 years ago, but I remember it clearly as it is the first and last racetrack I have ever been too, let alone the first or last I Have ever made a bet at. I came away about fifteen bucks down, but Uncle Garry made a killing on the slots, taking 700 at his best, and walking away with 500 bucks at the end. I was amused by our attempt to order food at the track when Uncle Garry asked for 'three meals' to be presented with a bill for about five bucks. All was soon revealed when the oriental cashier presented us with three cartons of milk and we had to explain that 'meal' and 'milk' are not the same thing, and although we appreciated the calcium, we'd rather have three hamburgers and fries.

We arrived home in time to meet Sue, Alex's new girlfriend, and then headed out to catch the second film of the holiday. After this entertainment we called at a house to meet up for a sly beer with some of Alex's friends (Stacey, Dutch, Chad - not present, Laura (?)) before going to Shoeless Joe's to pick up a evening meal and the rules of NFL/CFL. All in all a good night, and a couple more Canadian beers sampled.

Wow. That took a while. Hopefully next entry I won't have to catch up on so much - considering that these last three instalments have only just scratched the surface of what went on in the USA this summer... Will speak soon.

Although I left the last entry hanging at 8pm (Canadian Time), it wasn't until 10pm that James, Alex, Matthew and myself actually left for food. However this left a significant gap in the adventures of me and my sidekick James, so here is the next part of the chronicle:

We spent the night cruising the Strip, and after our investigations, we headed back to the Golden Palm. By this time the heat was nice, although the walk home was fairly long - part of me wished the pool was still open (we had had a social gathering there earlier before we went out) but being closed we simply got back and went to sleep.

The next day we were allowed to 'lie in' although we made an appearance down pool-side at about 11am where we met with some of the others and made arrangements to meet for a shopping trip to a nearby mall. At the mall we grabbed a sub and then visited as many surf clothing shops a possible (a number of purchases were made) before making moves to go back the hotel. James, Pete & Charley (who by now were getting pretty friendly) and myself walked back onto the strip checking some more venues before eventually meeting everyone in the eyeing outside the fountains at Bellagio and watching two fantastic water shows.

As we all were hungry now we decided to go and get a buffet dinner as recommended by Joe. Despite what we initially thought, this type of dining isn't that cheap - no matter how far you walk, and we settled for some exclusive but overflowing meal at the Flamingo in true Vegas pomp. Was mightily impressed/filled.

After the last of the dessert was polished off we split again and spent the next few hours mopping up the sights and attractions, including the free shows down the unexplored part of the strip. We got up as far as Treasure Island, but were so bitterly disappointed that the 'Sirens of TI' show had been cancelled due to 'high winds' (a mere Zephyr) we headed back along the strip and saw the last of the big casinos with plenty of photo opportunities. Major attractions of the night included

• Caesar's Palace (why a dog that small needs such a big palace I don't know)
• The Mirage and the volcano
• The Luxor and it's 'inclinator'
• The Excalibur
• The Hard Rock Cafe & Hotel
• The Bellagio Fountains by night

The next morning we moved on once more (yet another early start) and I was able to reflect on my time in Vegas. Although initially unsure of what I would make of the place I was pleasantly surprised and will one day visit again (this time when I can bet myself). The place is not tacky. Tacky is when you attempt to do something pretty grand or glitzy on a budget and screw it up, Vegas may well be bright, neon and glitter-coated, but it has been done at expense. This sort of grandeur is open to the masses and I cannot think of another example since Roman times, where so much money has been spent on impressing the general population who can freely roam as they like.

Our next stop was the Grand Canyon. As predicted by Joe, we ended up getting caught in the micro-climate that surrounds this great natural monument, and were drenched on occasion. Our first stop after setting up camp was the heliport where we took 35 minute flights over the area, and it was truly stunning. The canyon has to be seen to be believed, and even then it was hard to grasp the size of the thing. Later that night Joe took us to a viewing point for photos, and after we had food at camp (utilising the cabbage I bought in the coleslaw; turns out that I can't tell the difference between a lettuce and a cabbage) before retiring.

The next day would be our earliest rise - 4.30am for sunrise over the canyon and a 2 hour hike. There is a rule of thumb that it takes twice as long to come up as go down, so when we darted back up faster than we had descended Joe was more than surprised, but I think the motivation had mainly been in the thick red mud and puddles that had occurred we got caught in a rain storm at the bottom of our descent which prompted our fast return.

We dried out in the canyon shop and warmed ourselves with soup. More travelling today meant it was back in the bus to travel to our next Arizona-based destination, Betty and Rusty's out in the desert, about70 miles outside Phoenix.

Once again, I am going to terminate this blog entry for a while as something more important has arisen - season 3 of the OC starts here in about 5 minutes and I'm not missing it for the world... (how sad).

Summing up the events of this past week in one blog entry is going to be quite a challenge.I have managed to get near computers during this time, but it was either inconvenient, ridiculously expensive or slightly cheeky to access the internet, so hence the delay in blog entries.

I will tackle as much as I can remember in chronological order, but then will probably will throw in nuggets of things that I forgot and since came to mind as I work my way through this text as otherwise I'm going to be back tracking and editing for hours.

On our last night in San Francisco we moved back into The Commodore hotel on Sutter. Our trek was to leave from there the next morning, so to minimise on early morning transportation we decided to relocate from the hostel (which we had enjoyed a lot).

Food was once again Subway (Aren't we predictable) while watching The Transporter on the room TV. The next day was an early rise, a meet-up in the lobby and some introductions s we filled out paperwork for our tour in the lobby.

Our tour guide was a guy called Joe - Californian bord and bred and clearly a big fan of his job. There were mostly Brits (11) and two Ozzies, who we ended up becoming really good friends with. On the initial van ride (we were heading out to Yosemite) I sat next to two Welsh girls, Ellie and Kerry. It later transpired that Ellie worked for BHFNC (My client) and therefore knows Broomy, while also being the girlfriend of James' ex-housemate's brother. Small world.

We stopped for shopping, then lunch (staple sandwiches which were to become lunch every day) at a covered bridge. By this stagewe were getting to know people a bit better and by the time we had set up camp on the outskirts of the National Park we all knew each other at least by sight. Joe took us to explore the giant Secoya trees (the biggest living organisms on the planet) which provided time to get to know each other, including walking under and scrambling through some particularly old logs. The latter experience was very funny, and nobody escaped without a good thick layer of dust and dirt. Some great photos were taken.

At camp we played card games while food was cooked by the designated team. Toothpaste was evacuated from the tents as apparently bear attacks are regular and they have a particular penchant for Colgate.

The next day was yet another earliy rise and was the first indication that a pattern was emerging here. I slept really well (considering it was camping) and we made tracks up through the park. Enroute we saw elk, some very fats squirrels and some odd blue headed birds too.The vistas were stunning - truly beautiful almost untouched scenery. James and I concur that we would never have seen all this had we chosen to visit the park ourselves, and is one of the many reasons we have changed our preco0nceptions about travelling the world by tour.

After a good number of hours trekking up and back down, Joe took us to a secluded part of the park river where we screamed bathed in icy cold water. There is some good video footage of this but I haven't got the ability to attach it to the blog until I get home. Unfortunately I managed to damage my toe, and later I discovered the entire side of my foot had been shredded apart by the sharp shale I had heavily landed on in my first cannonball, but it's all clearing up now, and thankfully I escaped any pain.

That evening we ate philly steak at a park restaurant before heading back to camp via some impressive rocks including the famed El Captain rockface. Once again I slept well.

Another early rise and packing up tents meant we were back on the road. This time we were heading to a different type of destination; Las Vegas. The place really is as hot as it is made out to be, but all the same one of the most fantastic places I have ever visited. The glitz, neon lined streets and strange desert existence makes for a place that has to be experienced to be believed. Joe had totally talked down the rooms and the experience, and we stayed at the Golden Palm just off the strip. Undersell would be an exaggeration, as the rooms were the biggest we had been since since we had arrived in the states, and the location was prime, although we were only paying ten bucks per twin queen-size per night. I've never seen that kind of deal before.

We stuffed ourselves with pizza before, which unfortunately led to me bing sick (there may have been other factors like the water/atmosphere, but I am unsure and so have blamed it on over-indulgence), but it didn't stop me enjoying our first night out in the place, and we headed out to the hotel car park to be greeted by our 'ride'.

We had been promised a limo drive down the strip, but once again under-sold we arrived to find a gleaming black stretched Hummer and champagne. Awesome. I will never forget the ride. The driver had some bad-boy tunes on the system and we watched music videos on the monitors while we waited for the lights to change. It took one hour to travel the length of the Strip and back, and gave a really good opportunity to get our bearings. The drive was punctuated by stops at various points including a display the longest screen in the world, a 200 metre overhead video display to some classic Vegas music.

Many photos later we say in a bar at the MGM Grand, which is the worlds largest hotel casino. Joe had chosen the place as he knew we were less likely to get 'Carded' (ID'd) and we sat and drank some very expensive drinks. It was at this point we split and headed into the Casino.

Our Australian buddy Pete managed to do quite well for himself and actually came away with more money that he went with. Joe didn't carry such luck, but we all had a superb night, strolling down past and into the casinos including NewYork, New York, The Bellagio and The Monte Carlo.

I've realised we're going out for food. This story is to be continued...

Just to let you know we are living it up Vegas style! Its only something bloody ridiculous like 43 degrees but its fantastic and Vegas is as glitzy as it's made out to be.

I will write more thoroughly about what we've been up to when I find a cheaper internet cafe, but a quick roundup of events include hiking in Yosemite National Park and going on a stretched Hummer down the strip, bubbly and all. Awesome.

Stand by for more....