In Cairns/Sydney

So, I’m in Sydney. I’m not entirely convinced when

yesterday ended and today started; even though I didn’t have to cross any date lines or move more than an hour out

of a timezone, the two flights still took nine hours combined, and despite it being ten o’clock in the morning, it

feels like mid afternoon. I have a nasty feeling the jetlag is really likely to bite today.

James, apparently,

is somewhere in New Zealand and will be boarding his flight in the next few hours to meet me here at 2.30pm. That

leaves me doing some waiting. I mean, a lot of waiting. In fact, the past 24hrs have been mostly waiting. After I

got back from the war memorial yesterday, I have spent most of my existence wandering around subway stations,

‘skyliner’ stations and in airports. For example, five hours of last night was spent reading, then re-reading The

Weekly Telegraph. Unfortunately as someone with daily access to BBC News, the content is somewhat dated


Arriving in Sydney, I was a little surprised at the extent of the building works outside of

international arrivals. On closer inspection (as I tucked into what I would consider half a baguette for the

reasonable extortion of six quid) it is not works at all, instead a series of large arty, rusty iron meshes that act

like screens, but have the unfortunate appearance of a crumbling construction site.

Not all is bad though. In

fact you might get the wrong impression. Sydney is nice and cool, I can blow my nose in public, don’t have to

remember how to say thank you in Japanese and am enjoying comfortable surroundings on the sofas. With free internet

access. Why are they still charging for it in the UK; every other airport seems to be offering it gratis

apart from in the ones back home.

There was mediocre excitement on the flight in between the film and finishing

of Clarkson’s book. I was dosing in the middle of the night, when one of the passengers waiting for the toilet next

to my seat did a full on stunt-passout and landed flat on his back. This has happened before, and it might be

advisable that anyone considering flying doesn’t sit near me, except unlike when it happened last time and the

ever-camp air host(ess) screamed like a baby, this time the very casual Aussie air host(ess) waved a magazine in the

guy’s general direction and told him to get on his way. It’s this type of ruthless efficiency that drives this


I am guessing we are going to be hearing some dose of moanage today. Apparently Australia are waking

up to the news that Brazil won yesterday night. Well, that’s another 10p on the free accumulative bet I got with

Skybet… I’m going to have millions by the end of the World Cup.

[Apparently comments aren’t working (I

have heard). If you need to get a message to me it’s going to have to be via email…]